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The Difference Between Slaves And Submissives

submissives at play

Slaves are submissives

As a sub, you consent to submit to a Dominant partner. The consent is yours to give and retract as you wish without any backlash or repercussions. Brats love saying no, its part of why they identify as a brat, but they are still considered submissives or subs

Slaves are next level. The roleplay often becomes a lifestyle that incorporates consensual non-consent (CNC). Slaves, especially 24/7 slaves are often involved in long-term relationships (LTR). Generally speaking, a slave is in a 24/7/365 (every day, all year) relationship with their Master or Mistress. Their submission extends to life outside of scenes and play sessions.

The power exchange for submissives is limited to scenes only. Each relationship is different and has different dynamics and rules that are agreed on concerning the power exchange between the parties.


  1. A slave does not negotiate, whereas a submissive can.
  2. A slave gives up all limits that their Dominant sets for them, whilst a submissive has limits.
  3. A slave makes a choice to submit their will at all times to their Mistress or Master and choose to obey without question, whereas a submissive will obey and serve by choosing to do so each time and thereby retain their will and right of choice.
  4. Slaves accept obedience whilst submissives accept submission.
  5. A submissive is owned, whereas a slave is owned and possessed and becomes the property of their Dominant.
  6. Slaves may not sit on furniture and are often naked in the presence of their Dominants. They will always kneel at their Owner’s feet.
  7. Slaves have consented to no-consent, whereas subs have a safe word to end a play session. This may seem abusive to some for the slave, but those not in the lifestyle must remember that the agreements of what and what will not happen in the Dominant/slave relationship have been discussed and agreed upon before the relationship is formed and established.
  8. Slaves live the lifestyle, whilst submissives enjoy play sessions at sex parties with a Dominant.
  9. Slaves have one Owner, whereas many subs play with various Dominants. Many submissives will have only one play partner, but they are free to engage with others.
  10. Slaves have no rights, choices, or freedom and in some cases lose their names and become a number. This is a role they have chosen for themselves.
  11. A submissive may choose to submit sexually, but outside of the play session/bedroom or dungeon, they may still behave as equals to their Mistress or Master. They may even submit to domestic servitude, but a submissive may maintain equality in that relationship. A slave, however, desires every aspect of their life to be controlled and dictated to by their Owner.


Being a Top/Dominant/Mistress/Master is much harder than being a submissive or slave, as they are not only taking 100% control but total responsibility for everything that happens in that relationship. The submissive or slave’s role is simply to do what they are told to do, regardless of whether the outcome is good or bad.  In the case of a 24/7 slave, they have ZERO responsibilities as this is all shifted to their Owner.  They don’t have to make choices.  They don’t have to make decisions about what they will wear or the colors – their Mistress or Master will make those choices and decisions for them. They simply enjoy life with absolutely no stress or concerns, except displeasing or upsetting their Dominant.


Communication is vital for any successful and fruitful D/s relationship. Like any relationship, there are good days and there are bad days. Some things may be confusing and need to be discussed and sorted out. People get sick and the D/s relationship functions like a normal relationship. There are arguments/conflicts as both parties remain human and individual. As the relationship grows, there will be changes in personality and character. It takes time to learn, teach, and adapt from both the Dominant and the slave/submissive. Honesty, clear communication, trust, and respect between both Dominant and submissive are paramount especially when expressing desires, needs, fears, and concerns to each other.

Dominants need to be constantly updated about what is happening in the body, mind, and soul of their submissives. A good Mistress or Master will make reasonable adjustments to make their slave’s role more comfortable, thereby ensuring that they are kept satisfied and happy as well.

Happy sub = Happy Dominant. A happy submissive will move mountains to make their Owner happy. Clear communication from an Owner such as explaining what and why something needs to be done will ensure a happy sub.

Subs must know what the rules and protocols are and these need to be clear, concise, and attainable. Rules cannot be unrealistic. As a Dominant, you cannot overindulge in fantasies or over-construct rituals, rules, and protocols. A human being can only do so much in one day.

Personal integrity is just as important. Equally important is a certain public image, which means that there is a particular way that a D/s relationship is portrayed in public or around other people, especially at sex parties. This is an agreement between the Dominant and submissive that describes their relationship and status to others. It also dictates how they act in public, whilst still maintaining a certain level of privacy. This becomes more apparent in 24/7 Dominant/slave relationships.


This relationship becomes a lifestyle and it becomes a part of you. It’s the first thing you think of when a slave wakes up and the last thing before going to sleep.  A 24/7 slave is constantly in a state of servitude. A 24/7 slave will eat, think, and dream of being a slave

Being a 24/7 slave is not spending doing kinky things all day.  Many chores and tasks that are given to slaves by their Mistresses and Masters are everyday, normal life routines.  The exception is that a slave is controlled and owned by a Dominant. Some protocols and rules must be followed on a daily and sometimes hourly basis. A slave obeys orders. A slave does everything to ensure their Owner’s life is as easy and pleasurable as possible.

An important thing to remember in a 24/7 Dominant/slave relationship is that it is not an endless, long erotic session of domination and submission. It is a relationship like any other relationship.  The difference is that the Dominant makes the decisions and the slave submits and obeys. Another very important thing to remember is that either one of the parties may end the relationship. A slave always has the right to take off their collar (literally or figuratively) and leave. The choice to remain in submission remains theirs.

These relationships may seem or appear very confusing to many who are not in the lifestyle or who do not understand the idea of a lifestyle that may seem abusive, narcissistic, or controlling. What everyone MUST understand is that these relationships are agreed upon and consent has been given willingly by a submissive or slave to be treated and spoken to in the manner you are witnessing.  Likewise, the activities played out in these relationships are consensual and based on the utmost respect and trust.

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